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One of the best wedding gifts my husband and I received was Gary Chapman's The Five Love Languages. I didn't read it immediately; it collected dust on a shelf for a bit. However, when I did read it, it sparked a deeper conversation as I looped him into my a-ha moment. Why would a newly married couple not want to love each other better?

"If we are to develop an intimate relationship, we need to know each other's desires. If we wish to love each other, we need to know what the other person wants." - Gary Chapman

Once you know your partner's love language (as well as your own), communication becomes easier and needs are better met. For example, you'll feel loved when he starts a load of laundry if his love language is Acts of Service. He'll feel loved if you tell him how much you appreciate the laundering if his love language is Words of Affirmation.

So let's go! Here are 10 ideas for showing your spouse you love them this Valentine's Day and all of the other days, too.

A. Words of Affirmation

Life is sometimes hectic which means we don't take the time to effectively express our hearts to one another. If you can't imagine doing life without her because her encouragement makes your days brighter, let her know. If you can't fathom a day without him because he keeps life running smoothly, tell him.

  1. Write a letter or poem that expresses something you love about your partner.
  2. There's a card for nearly every emotion; find the one with the right sentiment and add a dash of love at the end.

B. Quality Time

First off, put the phone way. Quality time is not existing in the same space and breathing the same air. According to the Oxford Dictionary, quality time is "time spent giving another person one's undivided attention in order to strengthen a relationship." 

  1. Plan a weekend getaway for ultimate undivided attention.
  2. Take a walk, bike ride, or enjoy another activity together.

C.  Receiving Gifts

Sure, he could probably use a new set of screwdrivers, but what does he want? You may think she'd like an air fryer, but unless you're certain, don't go there. Listen and pay attention to your partner's interests. They're likely already telling you all you need to know.

  1. Flowers on any day aside from Valentine's Day are probably always welcome. They can be an arrangement from a florist or a house plant from the local garden center; you choose.
  2. A basket full of favorite candy, snack food, and drinks is a winner as it shows you are totally tuned in to them.

D. Acts of Service

If your spouse likes his or her vehicle tidy but simply hasn't taken the time to wipe the dash or vaccum the floorboard lately, you taking the time to do so is an act of service and thus, an act of love. 

  1. Surprise your spouse by tackling one or more of their normal household duties (trash, dishes, laundry, etc.). 
  2. Do anything that is beneficial to your spouse without being asked. The more out of your norm, the more meaningful it will be.

E. Physical Touch

Of course physical touch is a love language; where would a marriage be without it? 

  1. A massage is a great show of love. Find a good-smelling bottle of lotion or massage oil and soothe the weary muscles after a long day of work.
  2. Enjoy a movie together sitting beside each other. It's the perfect time for hand-holding, an arm over the shoulder, or cuddling on the couch.
PRO TIP / FREEBIE: Cook a meal at home together. This idea has the potential to conquer ALL the love languages: quality time working toward a common goal, opportunity to offer words of affirmation, an act of service to each other which results in the gift of a meal, and that dance in the kitchen is physical touch. *wink*

"Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins."
1 Peter 4:8